Temper, meet brick wall.....

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

As a society - we've failed

This is Tim Bomsa. And no matter what you thought of him or IF you knew him or not, he did NOT deserve to die.

A week ago, TIM BOSMA went missing. He went missing after he brought two men out for a test drive in a truck he was trying to sell. This morning, the Toronto police chief announced he was found dead. I say again, I am still amazed at human being's ability to harm each other the way we do. It breaks my heart as usual because this man was a husband and eve if that meant nothing to someone, he was a FATHER. That should have meant something to the person or persons who took Tim's life. This little girl will grow up now without a father.

Her mother will have to one day, explain to her little girl why every other little girls has a father (be it present or otherwise) and she does not. Tim's wife will now have to go to sleep knowing she cannot roll over and hold the man she's loved for most of her life. She will now have to wake up every morning, reliving the devastating news her husband will never be home again.

This shouldn't happen. Every day we have children snatched off the streets never to be seen again. Others we find years later abused and raped. We have grown people going missing over a truck--come on it was only a truck! If you wanted the truck and didn't wish to pay for it, while I don't advocate stealing, just take the truck. Why kill the owner? Why take a life? Why steal the one ray of sunshine someone has in their life?

Somewhere along the way, we as a society lost hold of what is truly important and in this shows me that we've devalued human life. There is a trend being followed where a person's material things is worth more than a human life.  We have to stop living this way-we can't keep living this way.

Noted, some adults are beyond saving. It's sad but it is true. Jamaicans have a saying "you can't teach old dogs new tricks." But please--we have to change. We have to teach our children that nothing...absolutely NOTHING is more important than human life.

If you feel like giving up - just remember Tim. Think of the pain his wife and soon his little girl will go through. And ask yourself, "can you watch another family go through this?"

I don't know this man or his family--never met them. But it still breaks my heart to listen to his wife's plea to get her husband back alive. It still does something to me to know this child will grow up without him. It still breaks my heart to know his family will never see him again and the last memory they will have of him is that someone thought he was worthless enough to murder over a stupid truck.

Though the family will probably never see this - I have to write this here. 

To Tim Bosma's family - I'm sorry. We, as a society failed Tim. But now, I am hoping justice will be served and it won't be such a gigantic, all around failure. 

It'll never get easy. I lost a family member before I was even born and it sucks even that way. I mean you hear everyone talking about how special he was and how he loved life and the people around and how he would give you the shirt off his back if you just asked and it kills you a little inside. It sucks because you'd want to know this person and you feel cheated. 

I can only imagine what its like to have known Tim, the kind of father, brother, uncle, lover he was and to lose that. But we have to go on. We have to raise his baby, and tell her of the good things of her father. Try and filter out the horrible end he came to - it's going to be hard with the internet but try. And when the trial starts for the men/women/man/woman who caused Tim's death, they're going to want to drag his name through the mud - Don't stand for that. Stand up for the man you know.  My heart and prayer goes out to you and remember your neighbors helped in the search. They stood with you while you went through the first part of this hardship, know they will stand with you if you reach out to them in the days, months, years to come. Know that even though it's not easy, and what's to follow may seem like hell, but put one foot before the other and go forward.  Do not be ashamed to ask for help - it is not a sign of weakness. The only thing that could make you weak is going through this pain and refusing the helping hands that will be stretched forward to you now. But the best advice I can give you now is to carry Tim in your heart. Remember the good things--his laughter, his love for his wife and child--carry him where ever you go. Love him just as fiercely as if he was still here. Never let anyone forget Tim.

Remmy Duchene

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Now at Dreamspinner Press

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