I took a breath, walked away from the computer, cleaned my whole house, drove my mom's car and washed it then finally sat down in front of my computer to pen a reply. Now, I know most of you reading this is thinking I shouldn't have responded to her because there is no hope for people like that, but I like trying to help people before I completely just walk away. I asked her what kind of black men was she hanging around with?
Ever since I was a child, I was never then one to conform to stereotypes. I watched Power Rangers instead of adult programming, I wore long, elegant skirts instead of booth shorts. I read books instead of going out and getting into trouble-I've been a strange against the grain girl since I was little.
One of the reasons I started writing M/M is because I got tired of the M/M I was reading. I've read books that I only finished reading because I paid for the things and would find it a complete waste if I DNR them. The gay romance/erotica I was reading were so deeply entrenched in stereotypes I wanted to cry every time. Either the men were too feminine, or they weren't at all very bright. One book I read had the main character sobbing from the fifth line of the first page and didn't seem to stop until the book ended. I'm not saying men don't cry, it's just they don't sob over every little thing--that is not sexy.
Which brings me to my black men. My black men are suave, intelligent -even if they aren't book smart they're street smart and they know when to be polite when when they need to be naughty. They don't talk thug. Sometimes there will be a splash of jargon in there but nothing too overtly offensive. I don't find thugs sexy. I don't like my men wearing their pants down showing the cracks of their asses. I don't like the flashing gang signs with "thug life" tattooed to their necks and saying the N word after every syllable.
It's like watching the newly coined "thug porn." The moment they start screaming "N word this" and "N word that" I clock out.
So, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with liking that or wanting to watch or read that kind of thing. If that's what you love then whatever floats your boat, but do not expect me to write that kind of thing. It is definitely not me and I don't accept that every black man out there has to talk as if they never heard the word "school". There are plenty of other people out there who write that kind of thing. I just want to make people see the other side of our black men. The side where they pronounce their words properly, who dress appropriately and who speak to people the way they would like to be spoken to. I write men who are positive role models, who are passionate and always seek to do the right thing.
What people fail to understand, is my brain works with things that I like. If a thug doesn't turn me on I cannot hope to write one that is as sexy as my man who works two jobs and is looking for love. I am tired of seeing black men in these roles that makes them seem as if they're the devil's offspring. This is another reason why I disliked the tv show GANG RELATED so desperately. It was another cesspool of the blacks were thugs holding their guns sideways and carrying out drive-bys, the Asians were Triads, the Latinos were Mexican cartel - it was just downright pathetic.
People are more than just the colour of their skin or the label we give them. People are better than the way a small a portion of fools from that culture. Look past the negative and see them as human beings deserving of love, laughter and happiness.
I chose to be that different voice that see through the horrible to the good. I chose to write men that I would date, that I find sexy and desirable. In my writing, I chose to be me.
Love,
Remmy D
This is why I enjoy reading your books. You, like I, believe me that there are intelligent, compassionate, educated black men out there. But it seems to be more popular to promote the stereotype of black man being the gangsters, criminals and rude boys that is saturating the market right now. The saddest part about this is the email more than likely came from someone of color. If we can't change how we see ourselves how we going to change how others see us? Keep doing what you're doing. Please continue to write your male black characters in a positive light. It's a sad and irritating thing to hear that speaking well and using proper English is considered to be attributes of the Caucasian population only. You know I've told you, and I've always said, I truly enjoy the way you portray black men in your books. As a woman of color I like to see them and I would like to see it more often. I've always said that there is a lack of diversity in the MM romance genre and when there is a character of color they fall directly into that literary trip of stereotyping characters of color. I can't tell you how many books I have read in this genre where I read about a black character's dialogue and they sound like street trash. There was this one book by a man who I will not name, but I will say that he is a Columbus, GA native but is now residing in Atlanta, where he made all of his ethnic, characters, black and Latino, sound ignorant. He also used words like "fat chin", "fat lips", "smells like garlic", "fat thighs" to describe all of the female African-American characters while he used words like "ivory skin" and "pristine" to describe the Caucasian counterparts. The two Latino he had in the book were both portrayed as untrustworthy and having a poor grasp of the English language. This despite that all of the minority characters had jobs where they are expected to have a good grasp of the English language or speak well. Even though the story told was really good it was that aspect of the book that turn me completely off and pretty much issue that I would never pick up another book that this man has written. I even went as far is mentioned that on the Amazon review.
ReplyDeleteGirl, you can see that I could just go on and on about this issue but you know how I feel about this.
This is why I enjoy reading your books. You, like I, believe me that there are intelligent, compassionate, educated black men out there. But it seems to be more popular to promote the stereotype of black man being the gangsters, criminals and rude boys that is saturating the market right now. The saddest part about this is the email more than likely came from someone of color. If we can't change how we see ourselves how we going to change how others see us? Keep doing what you're doing. Please continue to write your male black characters in a positive light. It's a sad and irritating thing to hear that speaking well and using proper English is considered to be attributes of the Caucasian population only. You know I've told you, and I've always said, I truly enjoy the way you portray black men in your books. As a woman of color I like to see them and I would like to see it more often. I've always said that there is a lack of diversity in the MM romance genre and when there is a character of color they fall directly into that literary trip of stereotyping characters of color. I can't tell you how many books I have read in this genre where I read about a black character's dialogue and they sound like street trash. There was this one book by a man who I will not name, but I will say that he is a Columbus, GA native but is now residing in Atlanta, where he made all of his ethnic, characters, black and Latino, sound ignorant. He also used words like "fat chin", "fat lips", "smells like garlic", "fat thighs" to describe all of the female African-American characters while he used words like "ivory skin" and "pristine" to describe the Caucasian counterparts. The two Latino he had in the book were both portrayed as untrustworthy and having a poor grasp of the English language. This despite that all of the minority characters had jobs where they are expected to have a good grasp of the English language or speak well. Even though the story told was really good it was that aspect of the book that turn me completely off and pretty much issue that I would never pick up another book that this man has written. I even went as far is mentioned that on the Amazon review.
ReplyDeleteGirl, you can see that I could just go on and on about this issue but you know how I feel about this.
It's so strange, I'm still shocked she would dare email that to me...I was like some people have no filter
DeleteI love your books Remmy which is why I love that we've decided to do a few books together. You and me love our black men to be intelligent, handsome, and emotionally connected with their men or women.
ReplyDeleteKeep doing what you're doing and forget the naysayers. Besides, if you don't, I will make a trip to see you and personally kick your behind. *laughs*
Yeah, love ya!
Both of you ladies do a fantastic job of bringing a bit color to this genre.
DeleteThank you dahlin
Delete